Building of Faith

Starting the end of August, after i made my decision to join the Bible Conference organized by Hope church as well as the "Persecuted Church Camp.. There were lot of up and down i gone through...rather to say it was my faith gone through up and down, i would say it was my semangat.. As faith given by God cant be taken by any1.. We cant let emotion and semangat pull the back leg of faith.. =') Too bad, my spirit influenced easily by things..

Honestly, i played dota often for these few weeks. So i would like to take dota as example. if this was a dota game, i believe i'll gain many experience point if i can overcome these up and down of spirit. I believe i am hitting a "Roshan" at low level.. thats the harsh monster..ya i cant do it myself But God is Mighty right? I may walk toward wounds, BUT the end of victory is a healing! Greater healing with Resurrection! Amen... I am stil hitting this high level monster.. God always want to build us, more like a pure Gold, which can endure to any challenges.

Once in July, i hurt my knee when playing basketball, with a clearly sound of "crap" heard.. It is not bone! but ligamen tear, I am having 80% ACL tear now..This injury do bring me quite a lot of problem.. it is not v pain, but unstable!

I am worry to further practise in volleyball,basketball and lot of more high demand sports which i may need to master as syllabus of my course. I turn nervous when i had came to the general hospital for scope. The 1st day b4 scope is still favourable for me as i can stay in 2nd class wad which gt aircond.. but it turn different when i myself have to being "bius". So nervous haha! Then it followed by a frustate when doctor told me ACL tear of 80%. I knew i hurt my ligament, but tat statement reli hurt for me.. That night i had a terrible time in inconvenience of movement, especially in go to toilet!!! MY knee felt pain after i move.. Thanks God painkiller was given by doctor...

Then i am given 2 weeks of mc.. Well i got alot of mc this sem.. Too much time to calm down.. But i didn't spend much time for God from that much much much of leisure time.. i did spent sometime on reading of spiritual book, think of the purpose of God behind all this thiings... well actually, what i had realize after these is my practical of faith is too weak.. i may know what should i do n what should i dont, but haiz.. i failed.. not bcz of God.. but jz because i didn't surrender all myself to Him, let Him incontrol of me.. I also realize how nice it is to have a simple but strong faith.. Just believe without much doubt.. But faith is something present with doubt and question, but still believe over the hope.. hmm, i want to be a people of strong faith in God.. used by God, to bring lives to Him...

My family helped me alot through comfort and support. but too bad i respond with my weakness of hot temper. i am sorry.. give me time to overcome this k? not by myself.. but understand Jesus more.. to love you all more too...